"I wish I was a messenger, and all the news was good."

Sometimes it can't all be though. As hard as you try for it to be, its just not. So you fall on your face (either figuratively or literally) and you pray and pray and pray for change.

I remember a sermon that I heard when I was twelve. It was about Elim and Mara. Elim was described as those mountain top experiences where all things are well, and all's right with the world. And then Mara is something all together different. Mara means desert. A dry period. In the past few weeks life has been very Mara for me, illness, money problems, stress, friends under stress, etc...But there is something I have noticed. When I have trouble, I begin praying, I begin depending on the One Person I can depend on without fail instead of trying to do everything myself. And then the fog begins to lift. Its happening now, I can feel it. I also look at beauty in the things He has created, in art and in nature worthwhile beautiful things, and I begin to feel peace. Slowly, one step at a time I begin to climb the mountain again. Maybe this time when I am on the mountain again, I will remember to be grateful.

Whoo-ah

I can't believe that so much time has past. Over 6 months have flown by since my last post, and so much has happened! I have finished my graduate school work (at last) and with that, my first book! I am also to get one of my essays published in a magazine soon. I will let you know more when it comes out officially. With all this change for me, being free of grad school and what-not, the immortal words of Guns 'n Roses seem to come to mind, indeed: "where do we go now?"

This question of what my plans are, has been asked a lot of me lately, as I guess you can only bask in the glow of your accomplishments so long before someone brings it up. I wish that I had an answer that will wow everyone immediately, instead of stuttering and saying, "Uh...work?"

But I do have a few plans--

First, I am grateful to the gods of inspiration (little "g") and also God (big G) to say that I have a couple of book ideas simmering in my cranium at the moment as soon as I can get some serious "butt in the chair" time as one of my writing professors was so fond of saying.

And I may try to teach a class or two. Perhaps this fall. To subsidize my current job and start paying back the government for my wonderful education (whoo-ah!). I just have to make my vita up-to-date and snappy looking. (By the way, if anyone has a vita or CV that they are particularly proud of, that I could look at as a sample, let me know.

Also, I plan to draw again. Maybe classes, maybe just in my free time, but I plan to draw. I am sewing too. I have started making an outfit without at pattern and I think that for my first stab at fashion design is kind of cool. I don't know that I will wear it anywhere, but we will see.

I am also planning to do a Bible study this summer with my friend that I am very excited about on the book of 1 John. :)

I also plan to spend as much time with my wonderful man as possible now that I am done with school, when our work schedules calm down a bit, if they ever will. But I am happy to say that we have been together for almost 4 years now, and we will be celebrating his birthday tonight! i know that this post has been about bringing things up to speed, but hopefully very soon I will begin to post more and again regale you with entertaining tales of "What the hell is up with Jenny."